My laptop died last week.

As fellow Assistants, you know the fear that can grip you in that moment. The moment when things aren’t booting up quite right so you try a hard restart and the start part never happens. Instead a dark, black screen simply sits there. No sound. No lights. No hope.

In a desperate attempt I reached out to our incredible IT department and explained the process of events that led to my current situation. They have always pulled a rabbit out of the hat for me and I’ve stood in awe of their skill and creativity to solve my technological issues. This time, though, I detected the concerned tone as they told me not to be too concerned. I left my unresponsive silver folder with them for continued efforts to bring it back to life and whispered a desperate prayer as I walked back to my office.

In a matter of hours, the team delivered a shiny new silver folder with 99% of my files restored. To say I was grateful is an understatement! What a relief to know that years of documents and work had been rescued from the black abyss. My prayers had been answered and once again they found that rabbit.

Yet, I found myself still hoping that 1% of lost work could be recovered. You see, that fraction of a fraction that was a casualty of this tech war were graphics that I had worked on for the past several years. I’m not a graphic artist but I do dabble in this arena for the Made Ready Trainings and You Are Adored weekly encouragements. This creative piece of my work brings so much joy and satisfaction. In fact, I had just finished composing nearly 100 images overlaid with scripture for our private Facebook page. All of them, along with numerous other images, were gone.

I heard the Lord say, “Let’s dream together.”

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord,

“plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.”

Jeremiah 29:11

The Lord wasn’t distressed at all by the hours of work that had been lost. Instead, He saw it as an invitation to dream! Somewhere along the way, I forgot how to dream. Life got busy and the (perceived) frivolity of dreaming was pushed aside for the (perceived) more urgent tasks in front of me. It took years for me to realize that dreaming actually has a very important role in my health and relationship with the Lord. He created me to be creative and stifling that part of me is like pinching a leaf on a plant – it withers and can cause damage to the entire plant. However, if I tend to that leaf it adds to the health of the entire plant and it flourishes. 

Sadly, I had relied too long on the creativity of the past to carry me through. I delighted in the gifts God had given me, promptly constructed templates and systems from them, and rolled full-steam ahead! That isn’t a problem until creativity takes a back seat and conversation with the Lord for fresh imagination dwindles. The Lord had my attention once all that past creativity was lost and could finally hear Him invite me into the creative process again. He has new ideas and wants to share them with me. Am I willing to take the time?

Lord, I will wait for you; you will answer, Lord my God.

Psalm 38:15

The Lord gives us His gifts to enjoy but not to keep to ourselves. He gives His gifts for us to enjoy and share with others. We are blessed to be a blessing! So while I am fully aware that the creativity the Lord gave me is to be shared with others, I now realize that it is also in need of refreshing. Those graphics and templates I composed were fresh for that time, but now they’ve become stale and He has something new moving forward. Not just for me, but for our team. Not just for how we serve but, for the way others are drawn to Christ in the way we serve. And if what we do is meant to glorify and be in partnership with Him, I don’t want to take another step without His lead.

So, yes, Lord. Let’s dream together! Show us your plans, unveil our eyes, lead us in your way. Refresh us in your presence and help us experience your love in new ways. Whatever we set our hands to, we pray that you would bless it and use it for your glory. Reveal opportunities you have set before us and show us how to invite others into your presence so they can hear with their own hearts the whisper of our loving Father…

You are adored.

“We earn trust in drops but lose trust in buckets.”

I’ve heard this wisdom shared by my Pastor numerous times as he’s described the precious value of trust. Pause for a moment and imagine how long it would take to fill a bucket one drop of water at a time. Hours? Days? Weeks? I suppose it would depend on the size of the bucket! However, losing the water in the bucket would take just a split second regardless of the bucket’s size. Very sobering.

As Administrative and Executive Assistants, we are entrusted with an enormous bucket. At first, the trust in our bucket was loaned to us. Others vouched for our integrity with their references when we applied for the position and we were vetted by an interview process. All of that trust was based on someone else’s good word about us. Then we began to slowly add to the bucket by personally demonstrating that we are trustworthy. Step by step, day by day, task by task, action by action and conversation by conversation we added one drop of trust at a time to our bucket. It doesn’t take long to realize how precious trust is, once we realize how long it takes to earn it!

Think about someone you’ve known for a long time. Are they trustworthy? Have they walked for years with wisdom and are they known for their honor? What have they done over the years that has helped bring them success in this arena? How have they kept their trust buckets full? When I think of these people in my life, I realize that I’ve seen them:

• Recognize its value. Foolishness highjacks trust; it takes wisdom to earn trust.
  “She is more precious than rubies; nothing you desire can compare with her.” Proverbs 3:15
• Stay humble. Pride is a slippery slope.
  “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.” James 4:10
• Be self-aware. We must stay alert to our own thoughts, words, and actions.
  “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” Proverbs 4:23
• Be kind. We are all human and need grace.
  “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.” Ephesians 4:2 

Interestingly, it is the trustworthy who are the first to say that they’ve made mistakes. A trustworthy person is not perfect. Instead they are quick to repent and seek forgiveness. Even when they are right, they work for reconciliation of relationships that have gone sideways. Because, after all, trust comes through relationship. I also see trustworthy people acting quickly to offer grace to others who have tripped and spilled their own buckets. Through their own trials and errors, they have learned that grace and kindness are not evidences of condoning foolishness, but they are the reflection of love that we have been given by our Father. These gifts are intended to be given away – liberally. While it will take time for someone to begin the trust-earning process again, we can make it a smoother process by being kind, showing grace, and praying for their restoration. After all, as daughters of the Most High, we recognize how generous our Father has been to forgive our own shortcomings and this motivates us to be quick to reflect the very love that redeemed us. It is a beautiful way to remind our own hearts, and the hearts of those around us, that …

You are adored.

As a young mom of two babies under two, I quickly learned it would be important for me to learn how to capture the attention of my child. Although my youngest was quite peaceful, my oldest was non-stop, go, go, go! From the first kick in utero, it seemed he was in constant motion. And when you are outnumbered by children in your household, you have to get strategic.

A precious mentor-mom shared the Golden Ticket with me. “Get his eyes,” she said. “Get his eyes and the rest will come with him.” So I embarked on capturing my son’s eyes. Lord, help me! I’d hold his chubby little toddler face in my hands and say, “Larry, I need your eyes. Look at Mommy.” The only thing that wasn’t moving on that boy what his face, and only because I had it held gently in my hands. The feet were moving. The hands were swinging. And his blue eyes were flitting all around, occasionally landing on mine only to quickly be distracted by something beyond me. What would it take for this precious boy to be still?

He says,

“Be still, and know that I am God;

I will be exalted among the nations,

I will be exalted in the earth.”

Psalm 46:10

How often do I do the same thing to the Lord? Convincing myself that if I’m in a state of perpetual motion, it will all work out. If I just keep moving, I’ll discover the missing piece. If I just keep looking, the answer will reveal itself. My heart seems to say, “Don’t worry, Lord, I’ll figure it out. I’ve got this. You can count on me!” As an Executive Assistant, my days are filled with motion – physical and mental. If I’m not implementing a plan, I’m mentally preparing for something. Events, appointments, email responses, calendar juggling… Before long, though, it can all add up very quickly. So I pick up the pace. Another responsibility reveals itself. I begin to jog. The phone rings. Run faster. Ahhhhhhh!  Suddenly I resemble a woman running with her hair on fire. And all He wants are my eyes.

Our God wants our eyes, our attention, our hearts. If we would just pause to look at Him we would see His loving smile. Stopping to give our attention to Him helps us to hear His voice more clearly. Once we hear His voice, we can’t help ourselves but to give Him our hearts and be gently led by Him. He delights in leading us to His answers that so easily evade us – answers for the very work He has entrusted to us! Yes, I was finally able to capture Larry’s attention. His eyes learned to land on my face and linger there. His ears opened to my voice and our eyeball-to-eyeball interactions became heart-to-heart conversations – usually ending in toddler-sized hugs. Of course there were times when Buzz and Woody were just too much of a draw for his little boy attentions and he’d happily run off before a hug. But that’s OK because knew that I’d captured his heart and everything else would follow.

Let me encourage you today to pause and let the Lord capture your attention. Take a moment to look into His eyes and see how loved you are. He has the answers to the elusive. He has the comfort for the disappointments. He has the peace for the overwhelm. He has the rest for the weary. As we still ourselves we will hear Him whisper…

You are adored.

Isn’t it funny how quickly we can forget things? Like why we walked into another room, where we put our keys, when we scheduled that appointment, what we were saying…. Yep, we all do it! I think, though, that the things I most want to remember  are all the ways God has shown His faithfulness to me. There is such encouragement in remembering the ways He has shown His love and sovereignty in ways so beautifully specific to me. Yet, I still forget. Especially in the midst of a new struggle. Why is that? My grandmother’s answer was, “We leak!”

“I remind my soul
I remind my soul
I remind my soul
I remind my soul
And I remind my soul
I remind my soul
I remind my soul
I remind my soul

He pulled me out of the pit
He put a song on my lips
He set my feet on the rock
He spoke a word to my heart
He pulled me out of the pit
He put a song on my lips
He set my feet on the rock
He spoke a word to my heart”

Grandma would have loved Pastor Jon Egan’s song, “Be Strong.” Ever notice how many times we sing the phrase, “I remind my soul”? We need to be reminded to remember….because we leak. Reminding ourselves – even reminding one another – of God’s goodness is necessary in our daily walk. Good times or bad, remembering His faithfulness is incredibly powerful and gives us the boost we need to keep going. It disarms the enemy’s lie of discouragement with the truth of God’s promises. 

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday today and forever.

Hebrews 13:8

So, give yourself a moment to listen to Be Strong and be reminded, be encouraged, be strong. Then take a moment and remind yourself of how He has been faithful to you. And finally, take another moment to encourage another about His goodness. Share a story of God’s faithfulness to boost the faith of your fellow Daughter of the Most High. He has made us sisters in Christ and we have the privilege of cheering one another on, reminding each other that God is who He says He is. Reminding one another that…

You are adored.

Just a few months ago, I was sharing that my current role is the all-time favorite of my entire employed life. A pretty big claim and it couldn’t be more true! The people I serve with are genuine, the work is challenging, and I have the honor of watching people’s lives change because of God’s great love for them. It is weightiness and exhilaration mixed together beautifully. 

These past two weeks, however, have been the most challenging that I’ve ever experienced as an Executive Assistant. I know how to work hard and I’ve lived enough life to understand the rhythm of highs and lows with just about everything I set my hands to. But these past several days have challenged me in ways I could not have prepared myself for. I’ve seen the frustration of our world’s circumstances bubble over into horrible vitriol. And it has been spoken vitriol.

Words. The power of life and death has been entrusted to us by our Creator.

As the gatekeeper of this office, I have the responsibility of being the first point of contact for the large majority of communications sent to my oversight. Mail, phone calls, in-person conversations, and (the most popular method of communication) emails…they all get screened by my eyes and ears first. Everything from sales calls, to wrong numbers, to informational pieces are included with the notes addressed specifically to him. All words. While some of those notes have been very encouraging, others have been passionate in the harshest of ways. Ridiculous reproaches hurled into the deep space known as Email Land.

I wonder, sometimes, if people realize that others actually see their words.

The tongue has the power of life and death,

and those who love it will eats its fruit.

Proverbs 18:21

While there is much to say about the responsibility of words and how they are used, I’d like to focus on how we as Administrative Assistants respond to the words we receive. How do we handle misguided passion? What do we do with false accusations? How do we respond to that “final straw” before we lose our own joy?

• Suit up!

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.
Ephesians 6:10-18

We know it but sometimes we forget. A friend of mine gave me a Wonder Woman trading card a few years ago and I keep it on my desk as a visual reminder to put on my armor. Whether we realize it or not, we are waging a spiritual battle each day. Warriors never go into battle without their armor.

• Believe the best first.

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.

Proverbs 4:23

We cannot afford to believe anything less than the best of our brothers and sisters. Yes, their words may not reflect the goodness of the Lord in their lives at that moment, but we have all said things we’ve regretted and I want to be quick to offer grace and prevent my heart from being tainted by unforgiveness. You should know that this is one of the most difficult things for me to do. My warrior spirit can be pushed for only so long before I want to wield my sword and set the record straight. Protecting my heart is best for me and the person across from me.

• Be kind.

So when you, a mere human being, pass judgment on them and yet do the same things, do you think you will escape God’s judgment? 

Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, forbearance and patience,

not realizing that God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance?

Romans 2:3-4

Sometimes being the hands and feet of Jesus simply means demonstrating kindness to someone who hasn’t earned it. Perhaps they are accustomed to poking the bear with a stick to be heard. We get to be the ones who usher them into the presence of the Lamb to be healed and restored. Just like someone else did for us.

Your work may be hidden but it is so incredibly important to the Lord. He has entrusted you with His Beloved – whether they know that’s who they are or not. And He has given you the gifts necessary to minister in this very unique way. Ministry can be messy. People can be difficult. Feelings can be trampled. So let Him clean you up, refresh you with His Spirit, and whisper His love to you so you can be His hands and feet to more hurting people. His whisper to all of us is…

You are adored.

He was the tallest man I’d ever seen – even taller than my Grandpa. His voice was deep, kind, and mesmerizing. I couldn’t stop staring. He came to our home that doubled as an office for my mom, a resident manager of the apartment complex she managed. I don’t remember why he was there, I just remember his undeniable presence. Despite my mom’s desperate efforts to shoo me to my room to play so they could discuss business, I wouldn’t budge. I couldn’t. It didn’t take long for him to ask my name and if I would like to sit on his lap while he and Mom talked. In a blink I climbed up on his lap and settled against his broad chest feeling so safe, so comfortable, so at home. I took his big hand in my little one and marveled at the beauty of his dark skin. I started rubbing his hand over and over until my mom finally stopped her own conversation and asked what on earth I was doing. “Mommy, it won’t come off.” After a split second of dead silence, his booming laughter filled the entire apartment. My mortified mother grabbed me and shooed me off to my room with a swat on the bottom. My last image of this gentle giant was of him wiping the tears of laughter from his face with his hanky, all the while assuring my mom that he wasn’t offended in the least. My poor mother!

“I wish we could be twins.” My best friend Steffy and I were walking hand-in-hand along the sidewalk that bordered the apartment complex we lived in. It was the early 70’s and we were inseparable. I wanted her braids and pierced ears with beautiful pearl earrings. She pined for my long, golden locks. And while we wanted to be twins, we also yearned for the beauty that the other possessed. Not to take it away from the other, but to have it with one another. We saw the beauty in one another even when we overlooked the beauty we each carried ourselves.

I grew up in the “Wild West” of Colorado Springs. I never witnessed the horrors of racism, certainly not to the degree of the American South at that time. However, I was always aware of the differences in the people in our neighborhood. The uniqueness of the Black, Indian, Hispanic, and Asian families that I lived among intrigued me. The beautiful tapestries that hung in their living rooms, the incredible aromas of family recipes floating from their kitchens, and the dialect spoken in their homes were intoxicating. And, for the most part, people were accepted and welcomed for who they were, myself included. It wasn’t until Junior High School that I experienced bullying based on the color of my own skin. I lived in a neighborhood where I was the minority. Being white was enough for girls to call me horrible names, throw rocks at me while walking to the store, or sneak firecrackers onto my coat collar and then light them while I was wearing it. Please, understand that I am not equating bullying with the horrors of racism but it was my first glimpse at treating people differently because of their skin color and it left a mark on me.

For those of us living in polite neighborhoods where racism isn’t as obvious, last week was a slap in the face to wake up. We’ve been thrust into the difficult, necessary discussions of the reality of our nation. Watching men – not actors – die horrible deaths on our televisions is terrifying. How could this happen in today’s world? In our country? I am weary of death, drama, and the intensity of life that seems to surround us even more these days. My heart is broken. My own family – my own flesh and blood – could be seen as representatives of the polar opposites of today’s civil unrest. My Black cousins who continue to be on guard from unsolicited bias and unfair treatment. My White brother who risks his own life each day in order to protect his community from those who would seek to destroy it. The Black man. The White cop. They are both my family. They are both in the line of fire, quite literally.

As Administrative Assistants in ministry, we are hearing similar stories from our church family. They are scared. They are angry. They feel helpless. They feel voiceless. And when people are desperate, they say and do things that surprise even themselves. Often doing it right in front of us; the people who most want to help them. How do we respond?

We listen. And listen more. We share our own story and dry one another’s tears. We apologize. Not necessarily because we personally perpetrated such cruelty but because we are so very grieved over what our brothers and sisters have endured. We speak. We stand up and identify wrong as wrong, and right as right. We speak with love and mercy and humility, knowing that we might still have our own biases and mess it up. But speaking in love – keeping the other person’s best central to our words – softens the unintended blow and opens the door for godly correction to our own hearts. We pray. Because Jesus is the only One who could ever heal these wounds, these thoughts, these beliefs. Because all of us are unaware, to some degree, of our own sin and need the love of Jesus to illuminate it and invite us into the healing process. Because this is a fallen world that we have been called to. Because we can’t do this without Him.

A new command I give you: Love one another.

As I have loved you, so you must love one another.

John 13:34

It is so simple. It is so profound. Love one another. Despite what we see or don’t see. Love one another. Regardless of how we are treated. Love one another. He has given us His love so we must give it away to those around us. His love is the only thing that can drive out the evil we face and we have the privilege of delivering it to those who least expect it to be offered. We get to remind people how loved they are. We get to invite people into relationship with their loving Father. We get to wash their feet. We get to offer them a cool cup of water. We get to celebrate their differences. We get to spotlight their unique gifts. We get to share the load with them. We get to remind them…

You are adored.

This week I joined a handful of other staff for the service recording in our sanctuary. As grateful as I am for our digital services, I was very excited to worship in person with a few of my friends again. In this time of COVID adjustments, I prepared myself for the changes I would see in the room. We had been asked to wear masks and maintain social distancing – a practice session, if you will, for our upcoming in-person gatherings. The facility team did an amazing job of placing chairs throughout the room in various configurations. The film team thoughtfully placed stanchions to prevent us from walking into certain areas and potentially unplugging a piece of equipment. (Yes, I would be that person!) Staff quietly visited from their seats, still not sure of what to expect, until they were ready to begin. Then the worship pastor greeted us all from the platform and it hit me: This is going to be our reality, at least for a while.

I wasn’t prepared for the emotion of it all.

My husband and I started calling New Life home more than 27 years ago as a newly-married couple. For a few years, we drove an hour each way to attend church before God opened the door for us to move back to Colorado Springs. The shorter commute helped us to really get involved as volunteers – Larry as an usher and me with women’s ministry. We’ve raised our kids here. Made life-long friends here. Seen tragedy and God’s powerful hand of grace here. I know this place. I know these people. I know the rhythms of life here. This is home.

But this didn’t feel like home.

Do you remember leaving home as a young adult to begin life at college, long-term missions, new job, or even marriage? No matter how wonderful your home life may have been, the excitement of this new adventure was undeniable. The focus was on what’s to come – new places, new people, and new experiences – and the familiar constant of home was reliably parked right where it’s always been. Until you came home for a visit. It might have taken a few minutes to set in, but eventually you realized that while you’ve been out living your amazing adventure, life continued at home too. And while the building of home was the same, even the people of home might have been the same, there was an undeniable change in the feeling of home.

So I took the next step and unpacked my bags. I’m home and need to get settled.

I unpacked my worship and I unpacked my tears. I worshipped because the God of the universe has never changed. He is the same yesterday, today and forever, regardless of how I feel, and is worthy of all my praise. And I cried because that is what we do when we grieve what is precious. It is how I am wired and I’ve learned that denying it only prolongs the necessary process of grieving. Funny thing, though, that the longer I worshipped and cried, the less I focused on what had changed. My attention shifted from what I’d lost to the only thing I’ve ever really had. My attentions where back where they belonged – on God. He had been comforting me all along, drying my tears, holding my face and inviting me to look at Him, to take His hand, and to trust Him. He has a plan!

Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past.

See I am doing a new thing!

Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?

I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.

Isaiah 43:18-19

A few weeks ago, this scripture had a very different meaning to me. His Word is living and active; capable of application in new ways. Even when the words don’t change, my understanding does. Suddenly what had been the source for grief became an actual breath of fresh air. The change around me became an invitation to see what God is going to do in my church family during this next season. I was being invited into His work. Again. Still. 

It is good to grieve as long as we don’t camp there. We should stay as long as we need, then shake the dust off our feet and step into the new thing. It is likely that I have a few more tears to shed and that’s OK. I’ll give myself space to let them fall. But I do not plan to dwell on what was because God is inviting me, inviting us, into a new thing. A place where He promises to make a way in the wilderness of the unknown and streams of life in a wasteland of uncertainty. What the enemy intended for evil, He will use for good and I want to be ready when it’s time to enter in.

We’ve seen this before! We know His faithfulness! We know He is trustworthy and kind and we have the privilege of helping people find this Jesus. It’s what we’ve always done! We get to usher people into the presence of Jesus, experience His love and forgiveness, learn to hear His voice. And when we hear His voice, we will hear Him inviting us in, whispering His love, and reminding His daughters….

You are adored.

There was a television commercial that was quite popular in the 70’s. Carly Simon would wail “Anticipation” as two little, freckle-faced boys oooh’d and ahhh’d at the kitchen table while the Heinz ketchup slowly poured out of the glass bottle onto the hamburgers Mom just made for them. Some of you may remember it, while others may wonder why they didn’t just buy the plastic bottle and squeeze it out faster. But that’s another conversation…

There was a romance to waiting, a delight in anticipation. Of ketchup.

Christmas presents have a similar allure. Who doesn’t remember sitting near the Christmas tree wondering what could possibly be in that beautifully wrapped box, or that one? Dreaming of all the possibilities! At our house during the Christmas season, my brother and I would lay on our bellies at the foot of the tree tormenting ourselves on a nightly basis. Finally, Mom would shoo us away, reminding us that we were not allowed to touch, shake, or peek. If we did – say it with me – “They would all go back!”

Our parents were teaching us the value of waiting. A lesson not learned in one shot.

Let us not become weary in doing good,

for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

Galatians 6:9

The writer of Galatians reminds us not to become weary in doing good, which often includes waiting. This implies that we must do good a LOT. We need to spend a long time in obedience to reap the harvest. This does not imply perfection, but a heart’s desire to be in holiness for the Lord. Don’t be discouraged when you stumble; don’t give up when you get push-back. Instead stand up, brush off your knees, and stay the course. It is this repetition of walking in the same direction, falling, and getting back up that grows the fruit of patience in our lives.

But this type of waiting for patience to grow doesn’t sound very romantic. It sounds like hard work! So Paul details three important points:

• There is a proper timing to the harvest. The Lord who loves His daughters is faithful to bring the harvest at the proper time. He is not late. He is not early. His provision is perfectly measured and timed.
• The harvest is promised. The Lord of the harvest can be trusted with the harvest. He does not trick His daughters with false hope.
• We can’t give up. The Lord is His daughters’ biggest cheerleader. He doesn’t punish us for falling down; His grace is abundant and He knows we can do all things through Him. So He cheers us on until we believe it too and continue on with renewed hope.

There is a romance to waiting on the Lord. A delight in anticipating what He has for us.

As we wait, we draw close to Him. We experience His sovereignty. We discover He is trustworthy. We see deeper levels of His character. We learn to rest. We learn to be still. We learn to let Him fight for us. We learn to receive from Him. We learn to hear His voice. And when we hear His voice, we hear the lover of our soul say

You are adored.

Brave.

We’ve all been brave during these past several weeks. We’ve faced the unknown with our ministries and our families. We’ve adjusted our plans on the fly, many times over. We’ve navigated difficult conversations with family and strangers alike as we’ve offered all we have – Jesus. Yes, we’ve been brave.

But this doesn’t look like the heroic princess plot that I’ve seen on the big screen. It’s been messy. My knees are bloody and my face is sweaty. I’ve stumbled over my words and caused hurt when I’ve tried to bring healing. I surely don’t feel like the creative and witty Merida or Rapunzel who find a way to make their way against all odds. I don’t hear epic music in the background of my life. And it is in times like these, when I’m feeling less-than, that the Lord often reminds me of my name’s meaning. Although it translates as “warrior maiden,” that most recent blow to my heart appears to convince the warrior within to hide in the shadows of hesitation. Or is she?

Have I not commanded you?

Be strong and courageous.

Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged,

for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.

Joshua 1:9

This scripture causes me to wonder if bravery isn’t as much a character trait as it is a decision. The Lord begins with a question to remind of us of his earlier commands to be strong and courageous, and to not be afraid or discouraged – two things to be and two things not to be. As daughters of the Most High, we must decide to follow our Father’s commands. Then, because He is a loving Father, He follows it immediately with a promise that He will be with us wherever we go. He doesn’t leave us alone; His presence gives us courage and His hand gives us strength we don’t possess on our own.

I don’t have to be brave on my own.

The warrior within me is actually the Warrior in me. It is by His strength that I can do all things (Philippians 4:13). He is the One who shows me the way through. So when I am hesitant, I remind myself of His command-with-a-promise and I decide to put on my armor. I don’t need epic music in the background of my life to spur me on. Instead I hear the words of truth that He sings over me. When I face the unknown and have difficult conversations, I can trust the One who leads me and speaks words of truth. He fights with me. He fights for me. He is with me. He is with you. And no one is fighting for us harder or cheering us on louder than our loving Father. He wants you to know that you are not alone, you are equipped, you are brave, and…

You are adored.

grace  <noun>

• Unmerited divine assistance given to humans for their regeneration or sanctification
• A virtue coming from God
• Mercy
• Pardon
• Disposition to or an act or instance of kindness, courtesy, or clemency
• Reprieve

All of us need grace and all of us want to give it freely. But there are days when our grace tank is, well, empty. We are mercy-ed out, there is no reprieve in sight, and we don’t have margin to offer kindness or courtesy to others or even ourselves!

Please see Definition #1.

May I be real with you? These past several days I have bounced back and forth from a tank full of grace to fumes of grace. I would like to say that this happens over the course of several days; slowly running out over the week. Nope. These days, I can swing frequently between different levels of grace within short time periods. Although I try to maintain some sense of decency with my precious family, I’m sure they are not fooled by my desperate act. And while I’m being honest, I’m not that good of an actress! So what do we do when we are running on empty?

Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat,

he said to them, “Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.”

Mark 6:31

There it is again. Rest. We simply must slow down. God did not create us to be refueled in mid-flight. We are designed to go away with him to receive His unmerited divine assistance and be regenerated and sanctified. Oh, the beauty of His grace!

So I pause and remind myself that this is His work that He has invited me into. I release my death-grip on the call list and trust that He will connect me with these precious people in His perfect time. Like He always does. I close the laptop filled with tasks and exhale. And inhale. And cry. And laugh. And take a walk. And take a nap. I pray and worship. And then do it all again because He has invited me into His presence. He has good gifts to give me – and I need to be still to receive them – so that I have something to offer to those He has entrusted to me.

He never intended me to do this in my own strength and our current world situation has simply swiped a big, yellow highlighter over my need for Him. Our rest, much like our work, will look differently than it used to. How much rest we need and when we need it has changed. We simply must give ourselves permission to adapt in this world filled with new demands and recognize that it is different now. It is in His presence where we can process face masks and social distancing and receive His peace. It is snuggled up in His arms that we can hear His heartbeat for us and know that it really is going to be OK. Have you ever noticed that when we are running hard, the heartbeat we hear is our own?

My prayer is that you have opportunity to refresh with your Father. Today. And tomorrow. That you make time on that calendar to simply be with Him and receive His rest, His gifts, and His love for you. Rest is not a luxury; it is a necessity. Rest is not selfish; it is the selfless act of trusting God to be God. Rest is allowing your loving Father to give you His divine assistance,  filling you, refreshing you, and reminding you that…

You are adored.