It may not be polite to say it, but in my role, I spend a fair amount of time managing others’ expectations
of me
of my oversight
of my time
of ______
Actually, I would suggest that most of us, regardless of our roles and responsibilities, find this to be necessary. Tell me, do you find yourself in conversations where you lovingly sit down with someone struggling with a concern and, before you know it, that concern has ballooned into a full-blown complaint? Suddenly we might find ourselves moving from a loving posture to a patient one. Then, if we aren’t careful, from a patient posture to a defensive one. Despite our best efforts to listen, hear, acknowledge, understand, and bring mutual understanding, we are often met with, “Yeah, but…”
Sometimes that “Yeah, but…” can mean, “Yeah, but you aren’t doing what I want, and you need to do what I want.” To which I might be tempted to say, “Yeah, but…” In all seriousness, though, there are times when hearts are locked against unity and that can be a difficult door to open. So I do my best to hear, “Yeah, but…” as, “Yeah, but I need more information.” Fair enough! Let’s talk some more. Let’s use that “Yeah but…” to dive a little deeper and find that burr under the saddle. My heart is to truly find a way for us to understand one another and come to a mutual understanding that we are FOR one another even if we disagree about something, especially among the family of God. Let’s find a way to make sure our expectations are realistic and God-honoring.
The hope of the righteous brings joy,
but the expectation of the wicked will perish.
Proverbs 10:28
Expectations can be terra firma or a slippery slope so they deserve our prayerful attention. Expectations can only be steady when we invite the Lord to open our eyes to see how he sees things. Only then can we approach the situation with a posture of partnership with the Holy Spirit to bring to fruition what he is bringing about – not our own agendas. Once our agendas get involved, the firm ground becomes the slippery slope.
For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword,
piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow,
and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.
Hebrews 4:12
If you find yourself weary of navigating expectations, please allow me to encourage you today – your work is not in vain. As you seek the Lord’s will and approach difficult conversations with his grace – desiring his will – he will be glorified. As you accept his invitations to partner with him in his work, he will be with you in it. We might not see the fruit of the seeds we are planting, but we can trust that he is the Lord of the harvest. The pruning that he does through the words and actions we prayerfully express is a holy work – in others and in us! We aren’t just managing expectations; we are stepping into messiness with the only answer needed. Jesus. We are carriers of the Holy Spirit for the blessing of those around us. What a gift that in times when people quickly have “Yeah, but…” on their lips – perhaps have lost sight of his best for them and are focused on getting their own way – we get to be the mouthpiece of his loving reminder that draws them back to himself…
You are adored.
You Are Adored 